Sorry, did I say “Can-do”?
I meant Kendo
In any case, neither is really a skill you can develop overnight. Both require years of practice and dedication.
I suggest you get started today. On one or the other. Whichever you like, really.
Excellent… I know you’re only here for the memes, but please stay for the slightly odd, short fiction. Or, alternatively, find out how to self-publish on Gumroad.
Juan Castillo’s Other Name
Juan Castillo’s Other Name is a tale of neurosis and delusion caused by a troubled childhood, an obsession with breakfast, and certain children’s books. Juan Castillo, the narrator, has checked himself into some kind of facility to escape from the world and “set the record straight” about disturbing events from his past.
What we – and possibly he – discovers is that he can’t escape and that the fiction of the past continues to dictate the reality of present and future actions.
CHECK OUT JUAN CASTILLO’S OTHER NAME BY GRAEME SMITH
Click the link below to find out more about Juan Castillo’s Other Name
Alec Dystopia – Citizen Journalist
Alec Dystopia just wanted to be happy. This, he was discovering, was problematic. In another time, perhaps it was his youth, he’d had a traditional education. Personalised. Automated.
Rapid advances in analytics and big data in the early 21st century meant it was easy and cheap to customise individual learning across every kind of demographic, device, operating system, and geographical location.
But the real price of Alec’s free and ubiquitous education had been the seamless integration of laser-precision targeted advertising and government propaganda. Beamed directly into his cerebral cortex. Read more here
CHECK OUT ALEC DYSTOPIA – CITIZEN JOURNALIST BY GRAEME SMITH
Click the link below to find out more about Alec Dystopia – Citizen Journalist
Bella and The Prince: A Classic Fable Retold
Every Princess Dreams of a Prince
Bella and the Prince is a retelling of a classic fairy tale. There’s a handsome prince who saves a beautiful princess with a kiss. And a happily ever after.
What happens before, during, and after is slightly different from the version you might have heard.
I wrote this tale of love, beauty, courage, and romance for my girls when they were small. I hope you enjoy it.
FREE for a limited time…
CHECK OUT BELLA AND THE PRINCE – A CLASSIC TALE RETOLD BY GRAEME SMITH
Click the link below to get your hands on Bella and The Prince – A Classic Fable Retold.
Or read on to find out more.
Here’s the first bit
ONCE UPON A very long time ago, there was a beautiful young girl who lived in a magical garden. The girl’s name was Bella, which means beauty, for she was indeed very beautiful indeed.
A high wall surrounded the garden and inside was every kind of wonderful tree and every kind of beautiful flower and every kind of delicious berry and fruit for Bella to eat.
Now the magic of the garden was a very old kind of magic that caused it to always be spring and summertime so that new and more wonderful flowers would blossom with each new day.
And on each day, which was always fine and warm with blue sky, Bella would skip and dance through the garden singing and enjoying all its wonders, talking and playing with the animals, eating the fruit and berries, and smelling the flowers.
And each day, her heart called out for the handsome prince whom she knew would come to the beautiful garden one day and marry her.
One day, however, something large and slithery and horrible slipped over the high walls and into the garden below. Soon enough Bella came skipping past where the terrible creature was lying in wait for her.
“Ssslow down”, it said. “What’sss your name?
“My name is Bella”, replied Bella. “I haven’t seen you in the garden before. Who are you?”
“I’m new. I’m the Ssssnake King”, it hissed back carefully.